Time flies

Well,  the time is finally here.  My baby is turning one year old tomorrow.  Wow, this time last year I was headed to the hospital in labor.  I remember my water breaking and me not being 100% positive.  I called the Family Birth Place and described it and they were like "Um, yeah, you should probably start thinking about getting over here. . ."  Nathan and Jake were grilling food.  I pulled Nathan to the side and let him know that my water broke, but that they could finish eating before we left for the hospital.  Funny, I don't recall experiencing any pain until I got the hospital.  And then, you better believe, I was epidural bound!  Long story short, my amazingly beautiful (no, really. . he was a good looking newborn) son was born at 7:07 A.M. on September 28, 2009.  The day that would change my life forever.  You can try and prepare for a baby.  You buy clothes and diapers and a crib.  You read books and practice breathing.  You take CPR and learn how to properly put on a diaper.  What you do not do, though, is prepare for the sheer amount of love you will have for this little person.  Nothing else matters.   You eat, sleep, breathe this beautiful baby.  Is he breathing?  Is he hot?  Is he cold?  Is he still breathing?  Should we try and feed him?  Do you think he needs to sleep more?  You sure he is breathing? You spend hours rocking and consoling and rocking some more. And making sure he is breathing.  He is so tiny.  A blob.  And then things start to change.  He smiles.  He laughs.  He sits up.  He eats solid food.  He crawls.  He walks.  He develops a mind of his own.  You realize he is okay without you some of the time.  You act like you don't realize that he is okay without you some of the time.
You go to put him to bed and he rolls over, grabs a blankie, closes his eyes, and goes to sleep.  No rocking.  No bedtime ritual involving a thousand kisses and trilling at his bird mobile.  You look over at him one day and he looks back at you and understands you.  He camps out by the door, waiting for it to open so he can escape to the big world on the other side. He pulls his hand away from yours and starts running down the sidewalk.  Without stopping or looking back to make sure you are still there.  He is running free. *bang* *splat!* He falls.  He looks around for you.  "ah" you think "he will come to me now" Nope, he gets back up and starts truckin' again. He is determined to be independent.  (He is determined to run me crazy)
Oh, how time flies.  My baby is turning one year old tomorrow.  And I think I just found my first grey hair.

Just a thought

It is hard to believe that my little baby is a little boy now.  He has thoughts of his own.  He has likes and dislikes. He has these wheels that turn in his head..like he is thinking about something before he says or does it.  I looked over at him the other day and he was looking back at me with this look of understanding on his face.  It took me aback a little.  okay, it freaked me out.  Where does he get off thinking for himself?  I didn't give him permission to do that yet.  I know it is time.  He is almost a year old.  Yeah, yeah. Whatever.  He is still my baby.  Mine.  The world cannot have him yet.  Anyway, I will be back tomorrow with all the party info and pictures!  Just had to vent a little.

Shake it up Baby

Ethan decided, for a few minutes last night, to become a kissy monster.  I went to put him to bed and he decided (to extend his wake time, probably) he was going to give me a thousand kisses.  Up one arm and down the other.  On this cheek, then that cheek..better get the mouth while I'm at it. Ooo, her neck looks good to try and kiss. That arm looks better than this arm.  Better have another go at it.  He gave me kisses for five minutes straight.  It made my day.
However, the fact that he is waking up during the night again is NOT.
And the Mighty No-Napper is back again.  Too much to do, too little time. I guess.  I know how he feels.
He is the cutest darn thing I have ever seen, though.  Walking around the house, squealing so loud his whole body shakes.  He get so excited over I don't know what. Everything. And nothing.  He pauses periodically to practice his dancing (the leg bend and sway) when he hears music coming from the TV.  Every times he sways, he glances over at me to make sure I am watching. Look at me! See how cute I am! We smile at each other in agreement of this fact and he toddles off to some other part of the house in search of a cord to chew on (no, I don't let him).  Even through his Meany Molar stage, he seems to be keeping his sense of humor. This is a good thing.  For both of us.
AND, I got my new(used) car on Friday.  I love it!  But you know me, I don't want to get too attached.  It will take a while for me to trust this new one.  I had my other one for a long time.  13 years.  Ever since my mom died.  That is a long time to have something and then just hand it over to someone else.  Okay.  So the car is being used by Nathan.  And he pointed out that I can still visit with it every night when he gets home from work.  And I can take her out for a spin anytime I want.  That is at least some consolation. Not much, but some.  That car has taken me on many different journeys through life.  Some better than others.  But it has always been there.  Never broken down.  Never quit on me.  Never abandoned me.  It is hard to relinquish that to anyone.  Even my wonderful husband.
On the other hand...he ain't taking the Subaru!

Do they make Xanax for cats?

Ethan has finally learned how to stand up by himself.  And I think Marley is having an anxiety attack every half hour or so.  But, I mean, did she really think this day would never come?   Now that he can stand up by himself, Marley has little means of escape.  Before, when he got moving too fast, he would fall and have to crawl over to something to drag himself up on.  This gave Marley enough time to formulate a plan and at least begin to enact it before Ethan could waddle back over to her.  Not anymore!  If he falls (which he does not do very often-it seems that once he learned how to stand up alone, he quit falling as much) he just stands himself back up and keeps going.  Marley has no time to think.  She runs this way.  That way.  Under the table, across the room. . .but he keeps coming and she does not know what to do so she jumps on the couch and then off the couch and runs into the kitchen and out of the kitchen and finally into the bedroom and under the bed. WHEW! Safe!  Not so fast.  Ethan has gotten down as low as he can go and is reaching under the bed.   Stretching his arm. . ..Almost...have...the ...tail....
It won't be long now.  I will be writing about how Ethan finally got Marley's tail and would not let go.  About how Marley finally had to chew her own tail off so she could escape him.  It will be an adventurous tale (no pun intended), for sure.  For now, though, his little arms are a bit too short.  And Marley has her safety zone.  But who knows about tomorrow.  Ethan could have grown an inch by then.

"I Just Called To Say I Love You"

I had a good day today with my little monkey man.  I woke up this morning feeling a little under the weather,but once the day got going I felt much better.  Ethan was so pleasant to be around today.  He kept toddling over to me giving me hugs and kisses all day.  He was a busy body (walking from room to room to room to room).  It was entertaining to say the least.  I especially liked when he would go into his room to play with his activity table.  He has this thing he does now.  He will walk over and turn the page on the "book" to where it makes music instead of saying things.  He then starts pressing the piano keys to make music and starts rocking his little legs back and forth to the beat.  I suppose he go that from me.  Every time music starts playing anywhere, I get up and start dancing.  I have for a long time now, trying to get him to do it.  He finally picked up on it.  And I have to say it is the cutes thing ever to see him swaying back and forth, smile on his face, head thrown back staring at the ceiling and then at me and then back at the ceiling.  I call it his "Stevie Wonder" impression.  He is pretty good at it.  We also went to the park.  He had fun walking around grabbing on to everything.  It was pretty hot outside today, so we could only stay about 20 minutes.  He had 2 decent naps and has now been asleep for 3 hours.  I just finished up studying and now it is time for bed.  I hope tomorrow is as fun as today. And, if not, there is always the next day to look forward to.

Sherlock Holmes

So, I had to study all week for my Anatomy exam.  But I am back now!

Ethan is still as cute as ever.  Walking around the house with a satisfied look on his face.  He is so cute in the mornings when he wakes up.  He wants to be picked up and hugged and kissed and then he wants to hit he ground running,  When I put him down, he always takes a couple of tentative steps (to make sure he remembers how, I'm sure) and then off he goes!  *pitter* patter*pitter*patter*  He has to go to every part of the house inspecting it inch by inch.  He has to make sure it is exactly how he left it the night before.  Of course, it isn't.  His toys are put away.  He promptly remedies this, let me tell you.  Usually our bedroom door is closed first thing in the morning, as well.  He does NOT approve of this either.  He will go and push on the door incessantly until we open it and let him in to the "wonderland" on the other side.  He then inspects every inch of the room, including squatting down as low as he can go to look under the bed for the "kitty kitty". (he does this frequently throughout the day-he just HAS to know where Marley is at all times). Finally, after he is satisfied that he has covered every inch, investigated every speck on the floor, and located Marley's whereabouts, he settles down to drink some milk and prepare himself for the day.
Of course, by this time he has tired himself out so much he is almost ready for a nap!

SHORT HIATUS DUE TO ANATOMY EXAM THIS WEEKEND

This is only a test. . .

Today was good.  Ethan practiced walking.  He goes one day crawling a lot and the next day walking a lot.  He cannot make up his mind which one works better for him.  Today was walking.  He walked around the house.  He walked around the yard.  He went on a walking adventure in Target.  Man, he loved that!  He was under the impression that they made that big space full of all sorts of goodies just for him.  I had to burst that bubble.  Or try.  It went something like this:

Ethan grabbed something he should not have.
"No, no Ethan"
*reaches for it again*
"NO NO Ethan"
*reaches for it again*
 I take his hand away from it "no no"
"ahhhhhh" * wimper*  "AHHHHHHH!!!!!"
* head shake*  firm voice "Uh-Uh, buddy"
*confused look*  *half smile*  "AHHHHHHH!!!!" *giggle*  "AHHHHHHEEEE!!!"

Technically it was not a temper tantrum, but it sure was loud and obnoxious.
People walked by and smiled or chuckled.  And, I mean, honestly that just egged him on.
"Aheee" *trill* "aheeeuhhhaaaa"
I understand the smiles.  I get it, it is cute in a way, but am I the only one who can see this turning ugly real quick? And he is loud.  I mean LOUD.  (Needless to say, we are working on the store etiquette.)
 On the bright side,though,  who would have thought a trip to Target could be so entertaining/embarrassing/adventuresome/absolutely perfect.
All in a days work for my little explorer.  All in a day's work.

No rest for the weary

Another wonderful day with Ethan and Dada.  He grows up so much every single day.  It is amazing to watch him.  Today was my study day.  He was not too happy about that, I can tell you.  Whenever I would close the the door, he would come banging.  He and Dada did have some fun...I could hear them giggling in the next room and it made me jealous. I did sneak out there a couple of times. I know! Study, study, study.  After all, I am doing this so he can have a better life.  Always have to keep the perspective when I get a little overwhelmed.  I am one step closer to understanding what I will be tested on next weekend in Anatomy & Physiology. For that, I am thankful.  Now off to do Comp 101.
*yawn*

This is the life

When I think back on my childhood, it all seems like a weird dream.  I don't think it existed in the magical way I choose to remember it.  I guess it doesn't really matter how it was, as long as my memories are all warm and fuzzy.  That is what I want for Ethan.  To look back and remember a magical place filled with warm fuzzies.
We went to the park yesterday. Oh what a difference a few days make.  Now that he can walk, he has a whole new lease on life (and the park).  He just walked around and around, holding mama's hand (some of the time) and exploring every inch of that green paradise.  He examined sticks.  He inspected blades of grass. He splashed in rain puddles.  He tried (to mama's chagrin) to make friends with the ants.  On two separate occasions we had incidences with rocks (let's just say a trip to the E.R. was barely averted...TWICE).  He met a little girl who caught his eye and was quite smitten until I reminded him that 5 months is WAY too young for him.  What did they have in common?  He is a walker, she cannot even crawl yet. He knows at least 4 words.  She can only babble.  After much persuading, he agreed and we made our way to the other end of the park.  No need for unnecessary distractions. There was a lot of park to cover and precious little time.   All in all, the park was such a new experience for him(and me).We laughed. We cried. We had about 20 Uh-Oh's. Got 4 scratches.  And 1 big Ow-ee that resulted in a bruise on his cheek. Man, it is amazing how much they change once walking is introduced into the equation.  It is like a little light bulb goes off and they realize "hey! there is a whole world out there...get me outta this house...let's go go go. . .who has time for naps?!?"
  I am excited for the day.  We have a little shopping to do.  We have a little laundry to do.  And maybe we will have a picnic for lunch.  As long as that little Lolita stays on her side of the park. . .

Where did my baby go?

Putting Ethan to bed last night, I realized how big he is getting.  He is not my baby anymore, that is for sure.  He started the finger wag yesterday.  I always wag my finger at him when I say "no no".  I wag it a something that he falls and hurts himself on when I say "bad" (such as "bad wall", or "bad Marley").  He now imitates me. Telling ME "no" is right around the corner for him, I am sure.  He also tried to crawl out of his crib last night as he was going to bed.  Way too small for that,yet.  But again,just around the corner.  And now when he knows he is doing something wrong, he will look at me and smile.  When I say "no no" again, he laughs.  When I swat his little hand (okay, I barely touch him,but it is the thought that counts. Right?!?!) he laughs HARDER.  He thinks it is a game.  I try to keep a straight face.  I really do.  I definitely need to work on my discipline skills here soon.  I don't want one of "those" babies.  And he has some definite "those baby" potential right now.  The way he throws a tantrum at even the thought of not getting his way. Oy Vay!  I am sure I will figure it out. Hopefully sooner rather than later.  Because he is asserting himself more and more every day.  I am not sure where that comes from. . .