Battle Cry

Yesterday I took a Ethan on a walk. We have this nice little walking trail behind our house. It winds around a kind of wetlands full of cattails and tall reeds.  It is usually a very pleasant stroll.  On this particular day,however, we inadvertently entered an army of grasshoppers.  By the time I realized what was going on, we were too far in the thick of it. There was no turning back.   It was like we entered a samurai battle.  There were hundreds of them! And they were crazy.   Jumping across the sidewalk in slow motion and catching on to a single blade of grass. We're talking Crouching Tiger,Hidden Dragon stuff.  Everywhere I looked there were grasshoppers. All shapes, colors and sizes. They were to the left.  They were to the right.  They were in front. They were in the back. They were even flying overhead like fighter pilots!  I was outflanked and outnumbered.  I had to make a run for it!  I started strolling as fast as I could, hoping that I would not feel the dreaded *crunch* under my feet of a casualty or two.  One lone grasshopper Kamikaze'd into the stroller.  I swear I heard him yell "BANZAI!" as he careened into the wheel.  I looked back to see him flailing his broken legs. I think he was shaking a fist at me.  In the midst of all this chaos, I look down at Ethan to make sure he was okay. He was leaned back in his seat drinking his milk and seemingly oblivious to the war raging around him. I strolled faster. Sweat dripping down my forehead. Just a little further. Almost there.  Finally I made it to a crossroad and back to the safety of the street.  Looking back down the path, I saw the army staring at me. Daring me to come back. Taunting me,in fact.  I thought for a split second of  turning the stroller back around. I could take them.  This time I would be prepared and not caught off guard.  I was devising my strategy when I happened to glance down.  That's when I saw Ethan drifting off to sleep. That's when I realized "What am I thinking? I need re-enforcements."  So I slowly  made my way back home. Vowing to return another day.  And show those grasshoppers just who they messed with.